Hope
by Kyra2
Summary: Crawfords visions lead him to someone that may be able to help Schuldig (prequel to Confessions) {het & yaoi}
1. Visions

**Warnings:** het, yaoi, Crawford POV, OOC, mild language  
  
**Ratings:** pg-13  
  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine, just borrowing them. I promise that when I am done I will give them back in the same condition that I found them.  
  
**Pairings:** To be announced  
  
  
  
  


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I am worried about them; most people would never believe that I am even capable of the compassion that it takes to experience worry. But then, most people never get close enough to know anything about me. I do pull off the stone cold bastard look incredibly well, after all.  
  
But if the truth is to be known, those three mean more to me than my supervisors can ever know. If the higher ups were to find out they would undoubtedly attempt to 'remove the distraction.' In other words, my teammates would soon be dead in an alley somewhere. With the exception of Nagi, him they would retrain. Death would be kinder.  
  
The reason for my worry is the same reason Schuldig would be killed instead of 'merely' brainwashed. He is slipping. The control that he has fought to maintain for so long is finally faltering, and I find myself growing desperate. The German may be unspeakably annoying, but he is one of my best friends and the sight of him huddled in a corner, rocking back and forth and weeping at the pain in his mind breaks my heart.  
  
Telepaths are naturally inclined to instability, the stronger they are the quicker they fall. Some are lucky enough to have natural shields, barriers strong enough to keep them in and others out. Allowing them to maintain their identities and not lose themselves to their gifts. Schuldig was one of those lucky few, once upon a time. He would have been safe, had Estet not broken his shielding in an effort to make him stronger. I barely got him out in time to salvage what remained of his sanity.  
  
We have been searching for something, anything, that can balance him. Some trick, some….magic that can bring him peace. Yet we find ourselves doubting that this being, this creature, this thing even exists. And so we watch, helpless, as he loses the battle. His strength of will failing him. The voices coming ever closer to stealing away the fiery personality we have all come to love.  
  
  
  
  


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_-Screams; Gunfire; Confusion-_  
  
The tall dark-haired man freezes, staring blankly into nothingness.  
  
_-Shining silver wire; Dead brown eyes; A young male voice raised in pain-_  
  
His knuckles stand out stark white as he grips the back of a chair.  
  
_-Familiar cries of anguish; Worlds spinning out of control-_  
  
  
  
  


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What do those pests have to do with Schuldig?  
  
Why is it so important that they survive?  
  
Why did I not see this before?  
  
I suppose it does not really matter, I have to warn them.  
  
  
  
  


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There he is, the brown-eyed one, Siberian. He is the most trusting, he will listen. And if he does not then I will find a way to make him. My team is depending on him, I will not let them down.  
  
"Be careful tonight Weiss, your targets are expecting you."  
  
I smiles as I walk away. That look of complete and utter disbelief is absolutely priceless. I could almost come to like that one. If he weren't so very determined to kill me.  
  
  
  
  


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**Notes:** Schu-angst. Not normally my style, but I just couldn't resist. He's so very….angstable. Is that even a word?? Meh, no matter. Comments and criticism are, as always, more than welcome. Flames will be used to sacrifice nosy neighbors the fan-gods.  
  
My thanks to everyone who reviewed Confessions! I appreciate it! 


	2. Clues

**Warnings:** het, yaoi, Crawford POV, OOC, mild language  
  
**Ratings:** pg-13  
  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine, just borrowing them. I promise that when I am done I will give them back in the same condition that I found them.  
  
**Pairings:** Nagi+Tot, Ken+Yuriko  
  
  
  
  


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We found it. The remedy to Schuldigs instability. The cure for what ails him, as Farfarello said. The only problem is, we are not entirely sure what it is.  
  
Put the claws away, Siberian, if I wanted to kill you I would have done it already.  
  
Would you calm down? I just want to talk, to pick your brain, as it were. It was your mission after all; maybe you will be able to remember some detail that we couldn't.  
  
Well, no.  
  
Actually we were so distracted by his sudden return to sanity that we missed a lot. You would be too if one of your teammates had been speaking unintelligible gibberish for a couple of weeks and then suddenly snapped back into clear and easily understood Japanese.  
  
Finally, you understand. So will you help us?  
  
Thank you. I will retrieve it from the cashier tomorrow.  
  
  
  
  


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Siberian has proven himself to be a truly decent human being. In fact, he is almost nauseatingly nice. It really is a shame that his girlfriend ran off to Australia. He needs someone to love, so that he does not lose himself in the guilt of killing and she is the only person that I can think of who is patient and understanding enough to put up with him for long.  
  
His team will suffice for now, but they have their own problems and will not always welcome his presence. They have not realized that that they need each other to continue forward.  
  
Yes, I will find a way to get those two back together. I cannot have any of those pests self-destructing. It would be a disaster if they did, besides I kind of like him.  
  
Enough about the Weiss nuisance, there are more than enough problems here at home to keep me occupied.  
  
That ambitious bastard Takatori paid a visit to his oh so morally deficient son Masafumi this afternoon, treating us to the dubious honor of meeting his pet team, Schrient. Those four fill me with a sense of deep disgust. A more half-witted, materialistic, co-dependent group of useless bimbos has never before existed. Fortunately for the world at large, they do not have a future. Only the youngest has so much as a chance, and even that is not certain.  
  
And of course, her uncertain survival is now important to the continued happiness of my Nagi. Prodigy has no innocence of his own, I know it makes sense that he would be drawn to hers, but I wish he could have found someone with a better chance of making it through the next two weeks. Or perhaps someone with more common sense. The girl has the average intelligence of an eight year old, without the survival instincts that keep real children out of trouble.  
  
The whole situation has given me a headache that stubbornly refuses to fade. It is almost as though there is someone out there working desperately to counter every move I make. I take two steps forward and they take three, always outpacing me, always ensuring that my efforts to protect those I care for will come to naught.  
  
It has to stop, I have to win. Failure is not an option.  
  
………Somebody please help me………  
  
  
  
  


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**Notes:** Okay, so it's more than a little melodramatic, but I couldn't help it. Not really in the mood to write comedy right now. I also apologize for taking to long, life actually got busy there for a little while and I only recently found the time to sit down and type up the story fragments that have been sitting in my notebook.  
  
**Misura:** Thanks for the compliment about Crawford and his visions. I appreciate it. As for the pairings, while I do like Crawford with Ken, I like him better with Ran. So Ken gets to stay with his beloved Yuriko and Crawford gets to unthaw the ice queen.  
  
**Kasra:** I will be dealing with Schus thoughts and feelings in a sidefic…..eventually… 


	3. Revelations

**Warnings:** het, yaoi, Crawford POV, OOC, mild language  
  
**Ratings:** pg-13  
  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine, just borrowing them. I promise that when I am done I will give them back in the same condition that I found them.  
  
**Pairings:** Nagi+Tot, Ken+Yuriko, Schu+Omi, Farfarello+Yohji  
  
  
  
  


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If I were a religious man I would believe that the gods are out to get me.  
  
Life of late has been even more trying than usual. That idiot Takatori has lost both of his sons and is becoming increasingly more irritable, more impatient. He wants things to go his way immediately, he wants me to find the people responsible for the death of those two delinquents and kill them. Something that I cannot do, and yet if I am less than thorough in my efforts I endanger the lives of my own team.  
  
The future is destabilizing, and I am not entirely certain how to fix it. The only think I can think of is to keep all major players alive and as sane as possible, with a little luck things might even out.  
  
Siberians list is sitting on my desk, not that I still have a use for it. We know for certain what Schuldigs 'remedy' is, and finding out was about as traumatizing an event as any of us could imagine. But really, who would have thought that the chipper little brat was the key?  
  
I wish we had.  
  
Schuldig has been fluctuating between overwhelming joy at finding his balance, painful guilt at having delivered the teen to his abusive brother, confusion that someone so outwardly happy must become such a large part of his life, and despair at having possibly already destroyed any chance of ever forming a relationship.   
  
He spent a few hours last night searching carefully through the boys mind, trying to find out why they match so well. I do not know what he found, but if I were to judge by the sounds of breaking furniture it could not have been good.  
  
That emotional roller coaster is wearing us all out and I fear what will happen if he isn't snapped out of it soon. I know that he has something planned; I just hope that I can work it into a coherent plan that won't annihilate our chances of survival.  
  
As if Schuldig weren't enough, I also find myself forced to deal with Nagis growing feelings for Tot and Farfarellos ever increasing fascination for Balinese.  
  
Why did my teammates have to choose now to fall in love?  
  
We do not have time for this. Estet is getting closer to discovering our secrets, it is getting harder and harder to hold them back and we cannot afford to be weakened or distracted.  
  
Things are quickly coming to a head, the next few weeks are absolutely vital and everything seems to be unraveling around me.  
  
  
  
  


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Hello Siberian, how is Bombay doing?  
  
Of course I want to know. You four are important to the future.  
  
We cannot be obvious, the elders are not stupid and they are far too close already.  
  
The elders, the council of overpowered lunatics who run Estet. They must never find out what I am trying to do. If they do we all die.  
  
Yes, as a matter of fact I am more concerned about our lives than the fate of those innocents you lot champion. That is why I am a villain and you are all heroes. Now quit yammering and listen to me.  
  
Schuldig has found what we have all been searching for, but it is beyond his grasp. You four must be careful, he is going to do something drastic and I am not yet certain of the consequences.  
  
Good luck, you are going to need it.  
  
  
  
  


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I hope he really can get them to listen, the flashes that I am getting are of pain…..for all of us. Something is coming, something that I have not anticipated, something that I am incapable of stopping because I cannot see it.  
  
Things are changing faster than I can adapt to them and for the first time in a long time I feel helpless.  
  
  
  
  


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**Notes:** Writing the way Crawford talks feels so…..stiff and unnatural. No conjunctions? Nooooo!!! Just hope it's not boring people too much. As per usual, all comments and criticism are more than welcome but flames will be used to scare my cat away from the kitchen sink!  
  
**Kasra:** There might be something, but then there might not be. You'll just have to keep reading to find out!  
  
He knows about Yuriko because he's been watching them since the second episode, for reasons that you already know because you have read Confessions!  
  
Yes, there are definitely some really unpleasant things coming up. Some of them will be dealt with in the Schu sidefic and some in future chapters.  
  
**Misura:** -Laughs-  
  
If the reader wants a wedding then a wedding she shall have! But it's gonna be a while before I get to that.  
  
Whee! You're always such a boost to my ego! And as I told Kasra, there might be something countering him. You'll just have to wait and see. 


	4. Headaches

**Warnings:** het, yaoi, Crawford POV, OOC, mild language  
  
**Ratings:** pg-13  
  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine, just borrowing them. I promise that when I am done I will give them back in the same condition that I found them.  
  
**Pairings:** Nagi+Tot, Ken+Yuriko, Schu+Omi, Farfarello+Yohji, Crawford+Ran  
  


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The past few days have been . . . both wonderful and hellish.  
  
We have gained reason to celebrate, we are almost free of our much-maligned employer, but the price for our impending liberation has been high.  
  
Much as I feared, Schuldig acted unthinkingly and may well have ruined his chances with young Bombay.  
  
I have no way of knowing what the full ramifications of his actions will be as my visions are still not coming with any regularity, or even clarity. I can only go by what my instincts and observations have told me.  
  
That boy is very protective of his loved ones, and he did love that girl. Whether or not my impulsive comrade intended to end her life or not, whether he even pulled the trigger, is unimportant. The kittens' so-called sister is dead and he is not the type to forgive and forget in this situation.  
  
_He pauses and takes a sip of coffee from a dark blue mug_  
  
To our great misfortune Omi is the least of our problems.  
  
If Reiji Takatori has a single good point it is his devotion to that girl. Ouka was his darling baby, the apple of his eye, and the only person that was ever completely safe around him.  
  
Needless to say, he did not take her death by Farfarellos hand well. If I never see another golf club again it will be too soon. It was all I could do to not pull my gun and splatter his power-hungry brains across the walls of that pristine office.  
  
No one hurts my teammates and gets away with it.  
  
But I know that I must be patient. Our time is coming, and my responsibility is keeping everyone alive until it arrives. A task that is proving itself to be far more difficult than I ever would have believed. Everyone involved is behaving as suicidally as migrating lemmings.  
  
Abyssinian has all but broken with his teammates, choosing to ambush Reiji Takatoris car instead of joining them in an assault on what is now the base of his personal army.  
  
He is lucky that I foresaw this before my powers went on the fritz.  
  
If I had not I would have been unable to stall him long enough for his untrusted commander to arrive and whisk him off to the rescue of his friends.  
  
Schuldig tells me that the rescue itself was truly something to behold and that if Mr. Fujimiya had not arrived when he did young Omi would currently be residing with us, most likely with an entirely new set of memories.  
  
I can only assume that this means the soldiers came far too close for his liking.  
  
At the moment though I am too relieved that the is thinking rationally again to care about how he handles any survivors from that ambush. Well, relieved and slightly exhilarated, though I do hate to admit it.   
  
That fight with Abyssinian . . . with Ran . . . was quite possibly the single most pleasant experience I have had in months.  
  
I was able to touch him, to see the fire in his stunning purple eyes and feel the silk of that amazing blood red hair. I was able to enjoy the exquisite challenge of predicting his movements.  
  
He is a splendid fighter and more physically attractive than almost anyone else I have ever seen. Adding to his appeal is my inability to fully predict him. Even when my senses and abilities are at their sharpest he is still able to land blows.  
  
This makes him impossible to forget, to ignore, to overlook.  
  
I must know him.  
  
Farfarello, the ever watchful and eternally surprising, clapped me on the back after the fight and told me that such a relationship would surely make God weep. Amazingly I am quite glad to have his blessing. It should make things at least that much easier.  
  
Now we all have to make it through.  
  
_He smiles coldly_  
  
Takatoris time on this earth is running out, my only regret is not being able to deal the deathblow myself.  
  


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**Notes:** I have decided to deal with Crawford's malfunctioning gifts in a sidefic at a later date. This fic is already set to be at least ten chapters long and is hard enough to keep straight without that. As such, I ask that you be patient and stick with me. I will get to it. Also, I offer my apologies for taking so long in updating. These have been a busy couple of weeks. As always comments and criticism are more than welcome but flames will be used to feed my favorite muse.  
  
  
**Misura:** _laughs_  
  
Most everything about him is sexy, but those speech patterns are still difficult. Schu's behavior will all be explained from his perspective eventually; I already have a good bit of that written, in fact. But you don't need to worry too much, he'll come around!  
  
_takes a bow_  
  
And once again I thank you for your compliments. You always make me such a happy little writer!  
  
  
**Mmha:** Thanks, I will.  



	5. Finales and Forebodings

**Warnings:** het, yaoi, Crawford POV, OOC, mild language  
  
**Ratings:** pg-13  
  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine, just borrowing them. I promise that when I am done I will give them back in the same condition that I found them.  
  
**Pairings:** Nagi+Tot, Ken+Yuriko, Schu+Omi, Farfarello+Yohji, Crawford+Ran  
  


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Beautiful moments are few and far between in this world, at least, in my experience they are. Because of this it is imperative that we relish those truly lovely ones that appear before us.  
  
The look on our erstwhile employers face when we told him our contract had been terminated was one such moment. The delicious fear, the impotent rage, the quiet seething hatred and gasping disbelief . . . it was like a banquet of shock, a symphony of negativity.  
  
Schuldig was nearly orgasmic, his hatred for that man quite possibly exceeds even Abyssinians.  
  
Though he will not tell me why.  
  
From what I can tell there were more than a few revelations made that day, but not a one of them changed his opinion of the man, in fact, I think they may have even intensified the pre-existing feelings.  
  
Despite that, or perhaps because of it, I really do wish I knew why he had us stop long enough to spit on Schuichi Takatoris corpse before we left.  
  
I know that the onetime police commissioner was giving our kittens their orders but that alone does not explain such an action. In the end I suppose it really is trivial, and I am certain that he will tell us when his is ready.  
  
Schuldig always finds a way to use everything to his advantage.  
  
He just needs time to plan. And once he has completed his plan he will discuss it with us.  
  
As we were finally making our way into the chaos of the night we distinctly heard the dying scream of one would-be tyrant.  
  
Reiji Takatori is dead.  
  
Abyssinian has had his revenge and we are all free, at least for now. From what we can tell they have taken their newfound freedom more seriously than we have, and scattered across Japan.  
  
Oddly enough, I never would have thought that they would go so far as to separate. After all that they have been through together it just seems very strange.  
  
Nagi tells me that their actions were most likely caused by the uproar of the past few days. It will take some time for people to forget that the faces of those popular florists were on wanted posters all over town.  
  


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He halts, staggering slightly and leaning against the wall.  
  
_-Sirens, cold air, the still form of a dark-haired girl-_  
  
_-Crumbling walls, icy water, the flash of a familiar sword-_  
  
_-Cries of betrayal, familiar wrinkled faces, despair-_  
  
All color drains from the already pale face as amber eyes widen.  
  


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The elders have returned, I must warn the others.  
  


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**Notes:** Yes, I know it's very very short. I just couldn't get this one to come out the way I want and you should just see the trouble I'm having with chapter 6. As always, comments and criticism are more than welcome and all reviews will be stuck to the fridge and worshipped daily. Flames, on the other hand, will be used to ward off the winters chill.   
  
**Misura:**Mmmm....images of Abyssinian are running through my head. And they're oh so pretty. Pretty sure that the katana can be avoided!   
Humor is most definitely needed. There's a great deal of angst yet to be written, after all.   
  
**Kasra:**Laid off?!? I hope you're having luck finding a new job!   
_takes a bow_   
I'm glad you think so. Schuldig is my favorite and I do try to do him justice.   
I will be covering most of the vision thing in a sidefic, however, there should be something about it in the next couple of chapters. 


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